I am the Elizabeth Taylor of the feline world.

Saturday, August 30, 2008

A Dream Destroyed

I have a really big problem:

Karen

She's totally messing up my system.

A week ago, Karen moved all of her crap (and herself) into her parents' house. This is fine, but she's become quite a hindrance within my newly enjoyable lifestyle.

First off, she told her parents that I really didn't need to eat turkey sausage at breakfast. Exactly what does Karen know about "my needs"? I happen to like the turkey sausage at breakfast, thank you very much.

And let me ask you this, dear readers of discriminating taste.:

If someone gets lunch meat out of the refrigerator and then puts it on the counter and walks away from it, isn't said lunch meat free game? On a couple of occasions I've helped myself to a snack, assuming it was meant for me, and these people totally start freaking out.

Karen's dad is pretty cool. He always gives me the lunch meat I was munching on after the fact.

"Oh yeah, that's going to teach her not to jump on the kitchen counters and steal food," Karen told him.

Whatever

Karen told me in June when we moved in here that this was only temporary and we'd be moving into a new house after she bought a new one.

Well, I've decided I'm not going. Karen's parents are far nicer. They totally understand my importance. Karen's mom even pours food in my bowl when she wakes up in the morning, as opposed to Karen who doesn't feed us until right before she leaves for work.

Besides, Karen has mentioned on a number of occasions that we would not be getting a house with stairs. Now how am I supposed to get my cardio?

Whatever. I'm tired. I'm off to take a nap with Karen's dad.

5 comments:

just bob said...

If you don't get turkey sausage, then lunch meat is perfectly acceptable.

Travis Erwin said...

Turkey sausage? How can you even call that sausage?

Kerry said...

A black cat showed up on our porch this week and has sort of seemed to adopt us. he bangs his head on the door and meow's when he's hungry now; almost sounds like a human knocking!

made me think of you, Penelope.

BlueBella said...

Sounds like Karen is pretty rough on you my dear. I would definitly stay with her parents and let her go to the new stairless house by herself! I bet she'd be crying over her turkey sausage in no time at all!

Emily said...

Penelope, don't you know that Karen's parents are supposed to spoil you? You couldn't expect Karen to give you the same love or attention because then you wouldn't want anything to do with her parents. It's their tricky way of making you like them : )